Can we talk about this for a minute?
“Authenticity is rebellious.”
I heard that phrase today and it lit a fire in my belly so strong I had to take a break from the memoirs and get back on the blog.
It was a phrase that fell into the Universe and landed in my ears and I haven’t been able to shake it. It’s currently like a bad rash sitting on my skin. And I just wanna scratch and scratch and scratch until it bleeds.
Why? Why is it bugging me so much?
Do we live in a world so diluted that being ourselves has become the “cool thing.” The thing that only the elite and the people who’ve “got it all together” know how to do?
We look at someone who’s being 100% themselves with envy. We try to attain it by mimicking the lives of those who are living authentically. But, don’t even get me started on the irony there…
And those that are leaning into their authenticity are said to be “outside the box,” or “breaking the normal.”
Are you kidding me?
How is it that we’re living in a world where being ourselves is not normal?
It’s making me MAD!
If anything, showing up as ourselves every single day should be the normal.
How did we get this way? Is it technology? Cubicles? Fear? A generational pass-down of pain?
This doesn’t need to be another rant on how social media is destroying our world in a live-stream chaos of filters, comparisons, and trend-setters. No, there’s plenty of articles that already exist discussing the many perspectives on which to dissect how we relate to one another.
All this needs to be is a reflection.
Take a minute and breathe. And ask yourself – How have I shown up today? This week? This year? This lifetime?
It’s not exactly an easy question to answer. We wear all these different hats: family member, worker, socialite, whatever else there may be for you. But are you present? Or are you simply filling a roll? Trying not to make waves, disrupt the rhythm of life, or do anything that could leave you feeling hurt or alone?
You, wearing the hats, playing the parts… I’m talking to you right now:
You do feel hurt don’t you? And lonely? Makes sense. Bear with me.
Because in all of our efforts to “keep the peace,” we slowly fade away. We numb-out, go through the motions. And yea, that could look differently for everyone, it doesn’t necessarily mean you’re not experiencing good feelings. But, there’s a twinge inside. It may show up in the quiet moments before bed, or when you hit snooze in the morning, or when you zone out into a song that sinks into your soul. There’s something “missing.” There’s something “not quite right.” There’s a desire for “more than this.”
Continuing with our efforts is our desire to keep everyone in our circles comfortable as well. We don’t want to push people away, feel judged, or not be liked, welcomed, or accepted into “the group.” But are we altering our personalities to gain that acceptance? Are we embellishing our stories? Talking less? Talking more? Liking things we don’t really like? Agreeing with things we don’t really agree with? Hiding things that bring us joy? Guilty pleasures are called guilty pleasures for a reason right? Because we’re meant to feel some type of shame for this thing that brings us joy? You have any of those? And when we can’t just unleash, embrace, and share in the things that make us us, are we really showing up at all? Are the relationships we have real? Or are they things that we’ve created as to avoid being alone?
You know how excited kids get about bubbles? You know how they run around and yell and giggle and chase these literal puffs of air around like they’re the greatest things on Earth? That’s authenticity. You think they’re thinking about what’s jiggling when they run? You think they’re worried about the way their laugh sounds? You think they are adjusting their volume to make sure the other people in the park are more comfortable? Definitely not.
And you know what happens? They are beaming with joy. And it’s so contagious! Have you ever watched a kid chase a bubble and not cracked a smile?! And you can bet that every kid within a 10-mile radius of that bubble party is begging their caretaker to let them go play.
There’s joy. There’s connection. There’s purity in the moment. Everyone is present.
It brakes my heart that this isn’t our world’s normal. Those of us that have found a way to play with bubbles in our current lives are living the “desirable, yet unattainable” life.
I think I could rant about this all night long. But that wouldn’t get us anywhere now would it? I vote that we take back the word “normal” for what it is.
Dictionary.com defines it as:
the usual, average, or typical state or condition
Let’s let authenticity be our usual state. Let’s let letting your freak fly be our typical condition. Let’s let saying what you mean, and doing what is right for you, and being honest about how we feel be the expected average.
I won’t lie to you… it will be uncomfortable at first. It will require stretching your comfort zone. And people will pull away. BUT, you’re going to have so much fun. You’re going to feel proud of yourself. And the people that stick around will pull closer than ever before. You’ll attract other people who are like you, also authentic.
Are you someone who feels the twinge? I challenge you to take a minute and listen to it. Because I can bet you that the real you is kicking and screaming inside, dying to be set free in the backyard to run around, do cartwheels, blow some frikin’ bubbles, and snort-laugh as loud as possible in the process.
Maybe you don’t know where to begin… that’s okay. There’s 1000 resources available, and I’d be more than happy to point you in the right direction.
I had to ask for help when I began the journey to authenticity as well. And I’m so glad I did. Because there will be days that don’t feel good. There will be days you struggle. There will be days you’ll wonder if you’re doing it right. And it’s a way more enjoyable journey when you have someone to call who get’s it. Who sees the real you and loves you enough to make sure you don’t compromise or settle for anything less than the life you deserve.
I think I finally took a deep breath. Authenticity really fires me up! And I intend on helping as many people as possible find out what that means for them.
That is the whole point of MAVERICK, after all.